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+ 273 Hi. Iím Spider Jerusalem. I smoke. I take drugs. I drink. I wash every six weeks. I masturbate constantly and fling my steaming poison semen down from my window into your hair and food. Iím a rich and respected columnist for a major metropolitan newspaper. I live with two beautiful women in the cityís most expensive and select community. Being a bastard works. Warren Ellis, Transmetropolitan, Vol. 4: The New Scum